Speak for your servant is listening

This trip to Haiti was so very different for me.  Every time I go to Haiti, I am changed.  I never really know what to expect. This trip I was overwhelmed with how happy I was to be there. I loved the hot weather, the bugs, the smells, the people and even stuff I can not even begin to describe.  I felt like my heart and soul was at peace.  It has been a year and a half since my last trip. My soul has longed to be there.  I thanked God every second for sending me to Haiti, for allowing me to do a little bit of work for him there.  I am not always this way.  In fact, our first trip to Haiti was not at all what I wanted to do.   Our first trip was not very easy. I actually went kicking and screaming (metaphorically, of course).  I felt God tapping me on the shoulder early in 2012.  Our Pastor had asked us to commit to 40 days of fasting and praying.  I gave this fast the most basic participation possible.  I did not pray like I was supposed to because I knew God was trying to tell me something really big.  I couldn’t do it. I didn’t want to hear it. I was so comfortable making these shirts in my basement and taking them to craft shows.  The United States is safe and comfortable.  I was technically following God. But, I knew He was calling Christin and I to a deeper place with Him. It is so hard when He is calling us to grow and stretch.  Our 40 days passed and I sat with my fingers in my ears.  One evening I met Christin at church for youth group.  I sat down beside her and she looked at me with tears in her eyes and a sick look on her face.  She said, “We have to go to Haiti!!” As soon as the words left her mouth, I knew that is what God was trying to tell me. That May, Tony, Christin, my Dad and I went to Haiti.  It was not an easy trip. But, God was speaking to me every second of those few days.  He was calling us to be all in.  All in with Made to Love and all in with him. God doesn’t call us to be comfortable. He calls us to be obedient.  That is all I have ever wanted to be. God knows I am stubborn, and thank God he is patient. I am so thankful God let me be a part of Made to Love and Haiti. I thank Him everyday for the Made to Love family and the beautiful place he has given us in Hamilton.   Most of all, I thank Him for the change he has created in my heart.  When he speaks, I try my best to listen.

“The Lord came and stood there, calling as at other times, ‘Samuel! Samuel!”  Then Samuel said, “Speak for your servant is listening.”  And the Lord said to Samuel: “See I am about to do something in Israel that will make the ears of everyone who hears it tingle.” 1 Samuel 3:10-11